Men are not afraid of smart girls

November 25, 2010 by Rivelino

Dat_Truth_Hurts: MEN ARE NOT AFRAID OF SMART GIRLS. Smart girls often just end up acting like men and therefore who wants to listen to that shit all day.

Posted in Uncategorized | 30 Comments

30 Responses

on November 25, 2010 at 11:44 am ashleeekaren

…so by the same logic, who wants to listen to men??
on November 25, 2010 at 12:02 pm namae nanka

haha female logic in full glory. take that rivelino.
on November 25, 2010 at 12:05 pm Rivelino

Haha good one.

I think the idea is that opposites attract. Polarity.

Also, there is the element of authenticity, being true to nature.

Example:

When I was hanging out with Alessandra, I felt like I was hanging out with a man.

If I wanted to hang out with a dude, isn’t it better to hang out with an actual dude, than with a woman who acts, talks, and thinks like a dude?

Or, just imagine hanging out with a guy who, it turns out, is afraid of spiders, cries at the drop of a hat, always talks about his insecurities, and who gets cramps.
on November 25, 2010 at 12:09 pm ashleeekaren

Haha, well, I dunno about female logic, I’m just talking about simple logic.

Smart girls = men
No on wants to listen to smart girls.
Therefore, no one wants to listen to men.

I personally don’t think any of that is true, Im, just trying to point out where DAT TRUTH HURTS logic leads him to…
on November 25, 2010 at 12:10 pm ashleeekaren

Not all smart woman are masculine!!!
on November 25, 2010 at 12:22 pm ashleeekaren

This is likely to get me in trouble but I’m going to say it anyway.

Some men are in fact afraid of smart girls. And this goes along with much of the PUA logic (at least the little I have discerned so far) so hear me out.

Lets start with the already accepted premise of:

smart woman = a man, or masculine energy.

Men are competitive, ESPECIALLY Alpha males. Not just PUA alphas but alphas in general. Alpha males in the animal kingdom (and don’t forget, humans are animals) compete constantly for access to females. This is part of their biological drive. The alpha lion with the biggest mane and sharpest claws will inevitably challenge and beat out the smaller lion who isn’t as big or as tough – then HE will have access to all the females in the pride and reproduce with as many of them as he can.

Now that that being said, if being intellectual means that a woman has masculine energy, then some men will find that to be competition. And it doesn’t matter how tough you are, you’re ALWAYS going to be afraid of competition – no one wants to be knocked out of the top spot, even if you think that the person trying to do it doesn’t stand a chance.

Being aware of the competition makes you on guard, and arguably, afraid.

SO, *some* men ARE afraid of smart chicks – those men don’t want to compete.
on November 25, 2010 at 12:25 pm Rivelino

Somewhat related:

I recently got back in touch with my friend Sabrina from New York. She was a very artsy, sexy graphic designer.

I should write a post about her, btw: The perfect way to never get laid by a pretty girl you are friends with. How to successfully be an orbiter for ten years, without even a kiss for your efforts. Not even when she was drunk at a strip club with you, get grinded on by a very expensive stripper.

So Sabrina was experimental, and after choosing the wrong guys — losers — for many years, I persuaded her to come to a lesbian bar with me. She was curious.

She eventually started dating girls.

Then she went back to dating guys.

Then she went back to dating girls.

So, after being out of touch for over a year, I asked her:

“Are you dating men or girls now?”

She answered:

“Men. I want to feel safe.”

That was a classic line. And she just said it from the heart.

That is the whole point of this whole polarity thing.

When I say, “Mia was feminine” what I mean is, she was delicate, bubbly, happy, radiant, light, sunshiney.

That is feminine. Light and delicate. And that feminine energy makes me feel strong and masculine in contrast. Being around her — being in her feminine orbit — made me want to do masculine things. Made me want to protect her and do brave things for her.

Of course, I need to find that inspiration on my own — see the Robert Green post — but that is the magic of feminine energy.

Sort of like that cheesy line:

You make me want to be a better person.

Same thing with masculine energy.

If you are around a strong, confident, decisive man, don’t you feel lighter, more relaxed, more fun, more dainty, and more kittenish and coquettish?

The answer is yes.

When I was hanging out with Alessandra, it was the opposite: She was so tough, gruff, and blatant that I felt like I was hanging out with a dude.

Now, don’t misinterpret me, deliberately or accidentally.

Every person needs to be tough in this world. We all need mental, emotional, and spiritual toughness.

Mia is really tough. She is working six and seven day weeks, 70 to 80 hour weeks, and one of the things that made me admire her is when she read to me emails how Shirley was trying to intimidate her and push her around, and how she fought back. With Shirley and other execs.

No one wants a cry baby. No one wants a spineless jelly fish.

But just like a white collar mans layers his toughness under a fine veneer of sophistication, the whole point of being feminine is to layer your toughness under a soft, delicate veneer of beauty, class, lightness and freshness.
on November 25, 2010 at 12:41 pm Rivelino

“Some men are in fact afraid of smart girls.

Lets start with the already accepted premise of:

smart woman = a man, or masculine energy.

Now that that being said, if being intellectual means that a woman has masculine energy, then some men will find that to be competition. And it doesn’t matter how tough you are, you’re ALWAYS going to be afraid of competition – no one wants to be knocked out of the top spot, even if you think that the person trying to do it doesn’t stand a chance.

Being aware of the competition makes you on guard, and arguably, afraid.

SO, *some* men ARE afraid of smart chicks – those men don’t want to compete.”

You are right. I agree.

Some men are afraid of smart chicks. I would say, some men are afraid of smart people in general. Some men are wimps.

So we should fix that to say, “Most men are not afraid of smart girls.”

From the original statement, the part I found more interesting was,

“Smart girls often just end up acting like men”

Which I think is incredibly true. I think “smart” is the better word, more than intellectual.

Smart chicks often become very ambitious, bossy, and demanding. I think that is fine in the work place, but for their own benefit, they should learn to turn that way down in the romantic marketplace.

I am going through a transition period myself because I have always been quite attracted to smart girls, or just smart people in general. If somebody knows something that I don’t know, I find that very attractive.

So when I used to hear about the “H Bomb”, of girls from Harvard talking about how men reacted negatively when the men found out where the girls went to school, I used to think, Ah those men are cowards, I would love to date a girl from Harvard, really smart and ambitious, that is sexy.

But now I see the other side. And this doesn’t apply to all girls at Harvard or whatever, obviously, but the other side is:

Who wants to date a ballbuster?

The chances of a very successful girl being a Type A, with a hard charging, cut throat, bossy, and demanding personality, those chances are high.

Not to talk about Mia again, but that was one of the reasons I got excited about her. I was happy that I could be attracted to a girl who was not super smart, not super ambitious or driven — in both of my two first relationships, with Valentina and Catherine, they were both very smart and very ambitious — simply because the femininity and classiness made up for it.

Famously, Mia did not know what “levity” meant, did not know what a “benefactor” was, did not know what the “Stockhold Syndrome” was, and a whole bunch of other things. I would teaser her about all this stuff.

And it’s not like she was a kid. Mia was 31. Or 30.

You know what? Who cares!

Again. She was feminine, classy, warm, and pretty.

If I want to talk about the Stockholm Syndrome, I could find some random dude to talk about that with.

And, in fact, it was sexy and seductive to teach her stuff, tease her, and it was an ego stroke to know more than her, and for her to know that I knew more than her.
on November 25, 2010 at 12:54 pm Rivelino

Thinking about it further, I have these thoughts:

I think that women who are “smart” growing up, they often feel that they don’t need a man, that they can make it on their own, so they develop this ambitious, hard charging, bossy personalities.

Actually, I don’t think that is true.

I guess what I am trying to figure out is, is it true that smart women are generally masculine in their behavior, attitudes, and aura.

Ashleee, you said:

“Not all smart woman are masculine!!!”

And that is true.

So maybe, the correct insight is something like this:

Maybe “dumb” women realize that they will need a man — or men — in their life to get ahead, so they learn to be more manipulative (passive-aggressive) and less directly aggressive.

The best way to be manipulate men is to be feminine, light, sexy — and to then have men as your personal marionettes.

So maybe that is the “dumb” woman approach.

And then maybe the “smart” women, a lot of them feel that they can and want to make it “on their own”, so they come off as more masculine, more mannish, more aggressive, and more direct.

This fits in very much with the “H Bomb” stories as well as with the “dumb blonde” stereotype.

So maybe that is the answer.
on November 25, 2010 at 1:14 pm namae nanka

Most of us are afraid of people who can understand us better than we can. Perhaps that we might be manipulated?
Now if the person is our friend, we won’t find them threatening, but with women the whole dynamic is different.
on November 25, 2010 at 1:21 pm yohami

I have my theories

maybe what we men call “smart” in a girl, is just the testosterone working in her brain. maybe we see masculine girls smarter because they talk our language

also, I find non-so-pretty girls smarter than the stunning ones, maybe they develop the smarts because they need to manipulate more

I dated a few girls who were really pretty AND smart, they were emotionally damaged / sexual freaks

I like beauty, but I LOVE smarts, so Im always in a crossroads here
on November 25, 2010 at 1:27 pm yohami

a side note, this “men are afraid of” is shaming language

its very easy to manipulate a man by telling him he is afraid of something, so here is the truth:

men are not ATTRACTED to masculine girls
men feel in DISLIKE with being chased by a masculine aggresive girl
men PREFER to be the hunter and not the hunted
men tend to pedestalize women, so if the woman behaves like a man, its too much PRESSURE in the hierarchy chain

fear has nothing to do with it, calling it fear is not going to change nature

I dont like masculine woman, period
on November 25, 2010 at 1:30 pm Evil Alpha

Jesus H. Christ lady!

Female Intelligence is only a problem to men because women make it a problem. You all are rabid star fuckers! State school grads seek ivy league dudes, not construction workers…. 6 foot models, seek basketball players, not soccer types. And rich girls seek even richer guys. Why would I want to hang out with a girl that has one more silly excuse, not to get naked? The only thing a smart girl is competition for is her OWN pussy!

Thank god though, that for every 6 cunty lawyer chicks, there’s at least one really smart girl that wants you in her pants, but realizes that because of her sisters, she has to play dumb so you’ll keep on talking to her. I appreciate such girls a bunch and so always treat them sooo good in bed!

Guys are burdened by girl smarts, not afraid of them…. We don’t fear you!!! After all, we are the ones with the muscles.

Now that I’ve clear that up, I got some football to finish watching.
on November 25, 2010 at 1:41 pm namae nanka

“Not all smart woman are masculine!!!”

And that is true.”

and that’s like NAWALT. completely pointless.
-1 for female logic.
on November 25, 2010 at 2:19 pm ashleeekaren

I agree. The dynamic between the sexes makes it different.

And note, I said *some*. Not all.
on November 25, 2010 at 2:21 pm yohami

afraid of smart people? nevah
on November 25, 2010 at 2:35 pm ashleeekaren

Burdened, not attracted to, those are all interchangeable with everything I said, and I agree with all of them.

Again, note, I said *some*. I don’t believe all men are any one thing.

Some men find it a burden, I get that. Some men are not attracted, and some men find it sexy. Some men don’t like ball busters, and some men do. But I do think that it’s possible to portray femininity and still be intellectual. I also think it’s possible that many women try to show their smarts and it’s a turn off. Men do that too. When someone is acting like a know it all, it’s unattractive, no matter what sex is engaging in that behavior.

I have a female friend who is very smart. Probably too smart, and she’s a Vet. Whenever we’d be somewhere and guys would start talking to us, she would immediately have to display her intellectual prowess and try her best to make everyone feel dumb. It was a turn off and the gaggle of guys would move on to the next crowd of girls. She was the ultimate cock blocker, so i get what your’e saying – the rest of us are pretty smart and educated, but didn’t seem to cock block ourselves in quite the same way that she did.

The only way she’d ever get hit on by a guy is on the dance floor because it was usually too loud for her to talk and ruin her own game. Then she’d proceed to make out with him shamelessly. I guarantee that had she had a real conversation with him first he would’ve gone running. Not because he was scared, but because she’s annoying.

I get what you’re saying. Enjoy your football.

Sincerely,
Cunty Lawyer Chick
on November 25, 2010 at 2:39 pm ashleeekaren

That’s cuz yore smart AND confident.
on November 25, 2010 at 2:44 pm yohami

smarts means:

hability to understand issues in a logical, emotionally dettached manner
hability to solve problems and resolve conflict
hability to create humor
intellectual curiosity, general culture

but there you go, you think of a smart girl and you remember your ball busting annoying friend

most smart girls use their intelligence to push men and everybody down, so THAT is a turn off
on November 25, 2010 at 2:45 pm yohami

amen
on November 25, 2010 at 4:07 pm namae nanka

“afraid of smart people? nevah”

yeah, cautious is a better word. not good for falling in love with a girl.
on November 26, 2010 at 12:07 pm Evil Alpha

You profess to get what I’m saying…. but I am not really feeling it.

When a woman says “Men are intimidated by my intelligence” implicit in the declaration is that she is not talking about just SOME men. At a minimum when ladyfolk are spitting words of “wisdom” about men, they are referencing their view of the average guy, if not MOST guys.

So “some” is not applicable to the kind of statements we are currently discussing. Even still “some” is a sneaky qualifier that makes damn near every statement true. Case in point.. “some” guys like to suck cock, but do guys like to suck cock? Hell no! Using “some” is cheating. So just quit it.

In addition burdened/”not attracted to” is NOT a synonym for fear/”threatened by” and burdened/”not attracted to” might not even be synonyms for each other. Let me explain. Men (most) love a woman in high heels, but heels drastically change the average height differential between men and the women in a bar.

50% of guys are 5′ 10″ or over, and 25% of women are 5′ 6″ ish or more. Now it’s no secret that women prefer guys who are at least a coupla inches taller than they are, so what happens when we introduce stilletos? A quarter of the women (who are now 3 inches taller than the should be) are now eye level to 25 percent of guys that are all of a sudden… too “short” for her. Pumps make noise and asses stick out so guys are attracted to them… but they are still a burden!

PS: Hopefully one day soon you’ll be signing your letters Former Cunty Lawyer Chick. Happy Black Friday!
on November 26, 2010 at 5:15 pm veskrashensjourney

I don’t think it’s true that smart = masculine.

I think the closer equivalence would be aggressive / ambitious = masculine, and therein lies the turnoff.

A smart woman, who is brainy and intelligent but not ambitious (particularly career-wise) is a wonderful thing. I’m an intelligent man, and I cannot stand women who lack intelligence. It gets ridiculously tiring to have to explain the same damn shit for the hundredth time, to someone who just. doesn’t. get. it. and who never will.

On the other hand, I think that a lot of the H-bomb factor has to do with the fact that women who go to Harvard, of all schools, tend to be ambitious career-oriented women, who are talented and intelligent enough (in general) to actually have a shot at being conventionally successful. They’re the women who become VPs and CEOs and Lawyers and Judges and whatnot. And what man wants to play second fiddle to a woman who not only will be spending 70-80 hours a week for the next 20+ years grinding their way up whatever ladder, but as a result of that be completely unable to put their needs as a man in the relationship first – or even to be able to meet them at all?

In contrast, there was a young lady I met while overseas a couple months ago, who was an electrical engineer by education. Brilliant young woman, long thin and willowy, had a wonderful feminine energy. Not only was she not intimidating, it was rather intoxicating to have someone who was that feminine who I didn’t feel I had to dumb things down for. Same thing with another young lady I was involved with a couple years ago – she’s working on her PhD in microbiology, after getting her Bachelor’s from Johns Hopkins in only 3 years.

And yes, before you ask – it’s Veskrashen; I just got around to starting my blog is all.
on November 26, 2010 at 5:22 pm veskrashensjourney

NAWALT is not, in and of itself, completely pointless. It’s a mistake to assume that all women are the same – there’s enough variation in men to see that it’s not true, and there’s no reason to assume that women are somehow immune to the phenomenon.

Among men, there’s alphas and betas and gammas and deltas and omegas and all kinds of other Greek letters that sound really cool. There’s provider types and cads and white knights and players. There’s those who are socially intelligent and those who are not; those who are book smart and those who are street smart. There are men who are kind and loving fathers, and those who never will be. There’s manipulative assholes, power hungry shits, and insecure bullies along with the generous men, cooperative leaders, and mentors.

Men cannot all be lumped into the same bin with all the others, especially when we’re talking about specific wants, needs, or behaviors. Assuming women are all the same all the time is disingenuous, if not flat out dangerous to those of us who are really wanting to figure out how all this shit really works. Calling NAWALT pointless is as much a cop-out to avoid debate as a woman saying that we’re bitter misogynists with small penises.

We deserve better than that, in both directions.
on November 26, 2010 at 6:12 pm Rivelino

Very well said.

I need to gather up my thoughts on that one.

I was watching this crazy video that Roissy linked to, and the black dude said “educated women feel they are entitled to an opinion”, and that sort of made me think about this conversation.

I think feminism makes every woman feel like she is the hottest thing on earth. Valentina actually makes this point. She is getting her mba and she sees a lot of the other girls who are not at all pretty think they are the hottest thing. They are not humble at all.

There is definitely some correlation among all these traits. What a man wants is a humble, caring, adoring woman.

Often, smart, ambitious, educated = arrogant, entitled, cut throat, ball busting.

This is a big topic.
on November 26, 2010 at 6:18 pm Lily

Great posts, both of them Veskrashen, will check out your blog, I’m really tired at the moment but will do asap.

Riv, interesting you use the word humble because it’s one I’ve been thinking of it a lot this week. I think a lot of people lack this, so many people seem so full of themselves.

But on this “educated women feel they are entitled to an opinion” Aren’t they? Isn’t everyone entitled to an opinion? Entitled is not a word I like but shouldn’t anyone should be able to have an opinion, even if others don’t like it?
on November 26, 2010 at 6:36 pm yohami

“entitled to have an opinion” means the opinion cannot be criticized, talked about, or ever confronted to the real world

everyone has opinions, so what, no one is entitled to have one
on November 26, 2010 at 6:46 pm Rivelino

“Great posts, both of them Veskrashen”

Yeah this guy is good. His blog has a lot of potential.

“Riv, interesting you use the word humble because it’s one I’ve been thinking of it a lot this week.”

Yeah I’ve been thinking about humble too. Humble has gone out the window in our society. Humble is for losers.

That is why AMOGing works so well. No one is humble on their own. You gotta smack them in the face to earn respect.
on November 26, 2010 at 6:49 pm Rivelino

“But on this ‘educated women feel they are entitled to an opinion’ Aren’t they? Isn’t everyone entitled to an opinion? Entitled is not a word I like but shouldn’t anyone should be able to have an opinion, even if others don’t like it?”

Yohami explains it correctly above. And it’s not just women, of course.

Nowadays, everyone is an expert. But a lot of these feminized women, in particular, have a massive chip on their shoulder. They feel very much entitled to their views.

Back to work. No more procrastinating.
on November 26, 2010 at 6:52 pm Veskrasen

@Riv – thanks for the complement, as always.

“Often, smart, ambitious, educated = arrogant, entitled, cut throat, ball busting.” <— That's pretty much it in a nutshell.

@Lily – looking forward to your thoughts over there.

You said:

"But on this “educated women feel they are entitled to an opinion” Aren’t they? Isn’t everyone entitled to an opinion? Entitled is not a word I like but shouldn’t anyone should be able to have an opinion, even if others don’t like it?"

Everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and views and opinions on the world, absolutely. You are not, however, entitled to be right, or to have your views treated as equally valid as others. If you are flat out fucking wrong, I am under no obligation whatsoever to respect your opinion or act upon it in any way that you would approve of.

That's the disconnect that I see – too many people (NOT just women), particularly ones who have been raised in an environment that places too much emphasis on diversity and respect for opposing views, have this impression that all views are equally valid. They're not, not by a long shot. There are some things that are closer to the truth than others, and this has always been the case. Demanding that I respect your view when you're batshit crazy is something that will instantly earn you my disdain.

That said, there is value in looking at the other side of things. Just because you're batshit crazy doesn't mean that I'm right; we could both be equally far from the truth of things. And it's a helluva mistake to dismiss someone's opinion just because it contradicts something you know to be "true" – the history of science is one of challenging a known and accepted truth, as is the history of progress in mankind.

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